9 days to go...
Odd emotions, can talk freely to W about it then the next minute I feel like I could break down! What's that all about?
On a residential trip with a group of students this week, so glad as it will keep my mind off things, just counting the days now.
S found out a few days ago that she is unable to have the time off. She requested the days weeks ago but due to staffing they will not honour them, so it's going to be just the two of us. Hoping I can stay at the hospital for most of the day then I only have the evening to get through.
W very nervous but confident about the whole thing, he just needs to buy some cheap shirts as he wont be pulling anything over his head for a few days...ouch!!
Sunday, 27 May 2012
Thursday, 10 May 2012
(53) Paranoid mummy!
Reality is hitting now.
Was doing OK until my sister asked how I was at the weekend, it's the first time anybody has asked how I was feeling about it, felt a little choked but passed it off and changed the subject. She asked if I had booked the hotel, I hadn't but I have now...I know it's happening and getting close but at the same time feel like it's never going to happen.
Since the weekend I have had a little bit of time to myself and caught myself thinking about the whole situation, felt a little down about it but I'm sure that is natural.
I am avoiding any conversation about the operation.
I am in the middle, worrying about how W is feeling and reassuring him, then covering my feelings so as not to concern him. Very mixed emotions, but I'm sure if he was having his tonsils out I would be this paranoid mummy!!
A friend dropped by earlier who I have not seen in months. He was very impressed with W's masculinity and how relaxed he was as W. He mentioned the anxiety as W had worked part time for him a while ago and he had witnessed this. As this has subsided now it's obvious that the dysphoria was the root of it, as time goes by I forget just how ill W had been at times.
Was doing OK until my sister asked how I was at the weekend, it's the first time anybody has asked how I was feeling about it, felt a little choked but passed it off and changed the subject. She asked if I had booked the hotel, I hadn't but I have now...I know it's happening and getting close but at the same time feel like it's never going to happen.
Since the weekend I have had a little bit of time to myself and caught myself thinking about the whole situation, felt a little down about it but I'm sure that is natural.
I am avoiding any conversation about the operation.
I am in the middle, worrying about how W is feeling and reassuring him, then covering my feelings so as not to concern him. Very mixed emotions, but I'm sure if he was having his tonsils out I would be this paranoid mummy!!
A friend dropped by earlier who I have not seen in months. He was very impressed with W's masculinity and how relaxed he was as W. He mentioned the anxiety as W had worked part time for him a while ago and he had witnessed this. As this has subsided now it's obvious that the dysphoria was the root of it, as time goes by I forget just how ill W had been at times.
Thursday, 3 May 2012
(52) Chaperone!
Had a lovely phone call off my eldest sister, Gill.
Not had chance to chat to her recently, we all went out to celebrate my aunts 80th birthday but not the place to catch up about W.
Gill and her hubby had offered to change their weeks holiday to coincide with the op in Brighton so they could be there with myself and W. I was quite touched by their offer but as S was coming with us I was going to be ok and not be on my own. I would have definitely took them up on the offer otherwise. Gill understood, I really appreciated her thoughtfulness.
Not had chance to chat to her recently, we all went out to celebrate my aunts 80th birthday but not the place to catch up about W.
Gill and her hubby had offered to change their weeks holiday to coincide with the op in Brighton so they could be there with myself and W. I was quite touched by their offer but as S was coming with us I was going to be ok and not be on my own. I would have definitely took them up on the offer otherwise. Gill understood, I really appreciated her thoughtfulness.
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